This week we finally started home school again. Mark and I had been talking about it for a few months, and felt like it was the right thing to do. I have been dragging my feet for a while though, thinking I could not handle those boys every day AND teach them, on top of everything else that is going on lately. But I've been surprised this week. There is a huge element of stress that has disappeared. No more racing them out the door in the morning to try and be on time after being up most of the night and waking up about five minutes 'till they have to be there. No more racing to get home when they get home at 3pm and we are still in town or waiting until 3pm to go anywhere and get anything done. No more homework! No more stupid red light/green light behavior cards to sign every day. No more phone calls from teachers asking if and when we are going to medicate our child. Can you tell I was frustrated? Mark was right, of course, I know this is the right thing for our family right now. We read together, and play together, and eat together whenever we want. We can plan our day around Mark's schedule. Which is a necessity, because some nights we don't get much sleep, and so Mark doesn't wake up 'till after 10am the next morning and it takes us about two hours to get him ready for the day.
I should probably explain why we don't get much sleep. Mark has been having trouble breathing if he lays down on his back. So he sleeps on his side, but he can't just roll over whenever he wants. He wakes me up and I help him get situated and comfortable. And we have to be careful because he does have pain in his left shoulder and his arm gets stiff and sore as he sleeps. He also has to go to the bathroom a couple of times a night. Some nights he wakes up and can't breathe enough to relax no matter what we do. When that happens I help him into his wheel chair and we just get up for a while, go into the kitchen and have something to eat or just talk, or he'll set his laptop on his lap, recline his chair and watch a movie on netflix. I usually go back to bed when he does that, but he does wake me up later to help him get back into bed. Usually this is when the sun is starting to come up and I am up for the day. So forgive me if you come to visit us and find me still in my jammies at 10am. We are tired. A few nights ago he finally decided to use the VPAP machine we have had for three months. And thankfully, it actually helped. He doesn't sleep with it, but just wears the mask for about 15 minutes before bedtime. Last night I think he only woke up twice. What a blessing.
We have so much to be thankful for lately. Every day I am reminded of what a blessing it is that Mark chose to be a police officer. What a wonderful and honorable career, and I can hardly believe the help and support we have received from Mark's fellow officers. They have truly gone above and beyond in their generosity and I am humbled to be on the receiving end of it. The fact that Mark is still able to work is a blessing I am hardly able to express my gratitude for. The police department has made it possible for Mark to work at the station, or even from home so that he can continue to earn a paycheck and provide for us.
We are also very excited to be having a baby girl! We had a bit of a scare a couple weeks ago in which we were afraid I was going to have a miscarriage. But it turns out the baby is perfectly healthy and growing as she should, but I have placenta previa, which may resolve itself by the time the baby comes, and if it doesn't I will have to have a c-section. At first I was upset at this news- a c-section! After having all my babies naturally I assumed this baby would be no different- I can do it, I am superwoman and everything. But then as I was telling one of my sisters about it all she said- a c-section! You won't have to go through labor! She also has had her six kids naturally. So it is starting to sound not so bad after all. Another blessing from heaven to be thankful for. And I am loving looking at baby girl stuff everywhere I go.